Don’t get me wrong, summer IS a joyful time of year for me. With it comes slower mornings (with no school time alarms), less extra-curricular afternoon craziness, and lots of travel with the six of us together. All wonderful things. But with these great things comes several OVERWHELMING feelings… of being behind, unproductive, and most noticably, time fractured (with fewer uninterrupted work hours available for immersive work). In addition to the feelings of inadequacy, I also experience the accumulating cortisol from the constant feeling of task switching. Something, I’m confident, is felt by many parents who are experiencing the “benefits” of working from home.

With four boys under the age of 16, it’s easy to feel pulled in a million different directions. They’re in that tricky age group where they’ve aged out of most camps and they don’t need a full-time sitter. It’s a hard space to be in as a parent. From summertime complaints of “boredom”, feeling the need to manage screentime and four parallel schedules of appointments and activities, summer is a great reminder that parenting is the “fullest-time” job. Attempt to add a career on top of this and it’s clear that something’s gotta give.

For years we’ve been discussing the amazing ability for humans to “multi-task”. With the arrival of the smartphone and more opportunities to work where we live, we’re quickly realizing that multi-tasking isn’t all it’s been cracked up to be. Famous stress clinician Dr. Iditi Nerurkar shares that we don’t actually have the ability to do two things at once. Instead, we’re continually “context switching”, which decreases our productivity, quality of work and makes us feel drained.

This summer I’ve made a few changes, all which have helped me to mitigate the mental strain that comes with working from home through the kids’ summer vacation.

A MINDSET SWITCH

We can all, including myself, get wrapped up in all-or-nothing thinking. “I can’t get ANYTHING done!” (Sound familiar?). This summer, I heard a “productivity hack” (really more of a mindset hack) and it has helped me shift my mindset from what ISN’T getting done, to what IS. 

I start planning my week, as always, with all the things (big and small) that need to get done. BUT, as I write in larger projects, I took the suggestion of breaking them down into the tiniest of tasks that I can. What this has done is help me to focus on completing one of a few, small sections of that larger tasks, in the small blocks of time I may have available on a designated day. By doing this I feel that I’ve successfully accomplished a few small steps towards the larger picture, versus focusing on the large project that is “still not done.” This has been invaluable in helping me feel like I’m moving forward, even while travelling with the family.

CREATING BOUNDARIES

I personally find my stress sky rocking when trying to focus with four boys bickering, playing and living life around me. When I am forced to do this, my work is very inefficient and messy.  This year I felt the need to double down on boundaries. When heading into work mode, I am sure to clearly tell the boys that I am “starting work”, and I will let them know when I’m done. I lay out all that I can for them, sometimes with bulleted lists, to prevent them from having the need to interrupt. I clearly state what constitutes an emergency, and what can wait. I proceed to the two spaces in my home where I can shut the door and create a physical boundary. Since we don’t have designated “office” space in our home, these both are enormously helpful.

SCHEDULING TIME BLOCKS FOR FLOW

There are several things that need my full, deep attention, which simply cannot be attained with the distractions of home. Several times a week, I am sure to schedule a few time blocks for deep work that needs my full attention. I often use my in-town office space, but also love to use a super quiet space in our public library. This usually involves setting up a sitter or asking my mother-in-law to help so that I know that all things on the home front can be taken care of without me. I have found that if I commit to organizing a sitter, it forces me to think hard about what tasks need to be scheduled in this time, and to be fully focused on them during these allotted time slots.

Eliminating Notifications: The No-Brainer

The constant notifications that come as a result of our tech can have catastrophic effect on our ability to stay focused on what we’re trying to get done. It is essential to turn off all notifications when in work mode either through a temporary setting (i.e. focus mode, shutting it down, etc.) or through the creation of a geographic boundary (leaving your phone in a separate room, out of sight, etc.) Having the phone out of sight helps me to stay focus through interruptions and resist the urge to pick it up and scroll email, social… etc. This is CRITICAL for focusing on what matters most.

Summer is a challenging time of year, especially for those of us juggling work and family life at home. However, by adopting a mindset of progress over perfection, setting clear boundaries, and making intentional choices about our time and focus, summertime can feel easier. By doing these things, we can enjoy the best of both worlds… productive workdays and meaningful time with family, all while maintaining our sanity.